A License – a certificate giving the bearer the permission to do something after they have shown enough evidence that they possess the skill to do the said activity. We have to prove our worth to do so many day to day activities. Education certificates to prove our knowledge in the subjects, we have a license to drive, to practice law, medicine. Approvals to build homes, to own businesses. Almost everything needs a certain level of know-how on the subject and some sort of process to assess the knowledge.
Yet, when it comes to being a parent. We have no such system or a process for assessing the level of knowledge and skills that is required to take care of a life. A life that is totally dependent. This is not a complaint about others but rather a musing that I have had for myself.
If the parent , be it the mother or the father, isn’t surrounded by other parents, who have done it and learnt along the way, to teach the first steps. In the absence of such people ,the parent isnt willing to learn from books or look up the internet. In the absence of it all, the willingness to ask and to recieve help. What happens to the child?
It isn’t about the physical health but mental health am gravely concerned.
There are so many kids who grow up, even within a two parent -economically sound home, without physical assurance of love that builds their confidence, Without appreciation for little “see what I did” . Without a little hug after an angry outburst, who listen to rants and pick up bad language, who in the guise of being independent doesn’t have a parent to correct them , without the teaching of what you ought to do or ought to say to their own friends, to be polite , to be not a bully, to be appreciative of things, to be not opportunistic, to share with others the common resources. To see a parent not condone a bad behaviour in public, but to correct with love.
And we wonder why these bad behaviour permeates through their adolescence into teens.
Every kid has a different personality and behaviour. Am not suggesting we change them, but rather model them to be a good human beings. That is all. To put some effort into Parenting.
PS: I like the concept of a parent workshop. Workshops to check if what you are doing is right and to give info on how to do better.