If given a chance, what would you tell your 18-20 years old self from where you stand today?
For clarity, this is not a post about living in hindsight, living with regrets. It’s not, for I believe, We as people take decisions or make choices for that given moment, with all our experiences and resources, information, emotional maturity and behaviour of people around us at that time. It is our best-informed decision for “that” moment alone.
So it’s upon us and us alone for all that we are now! Period.
But it’s therapeutic, or has a calming effect, to think that you could have been someone else, a better version of yourself if only you knew back then, what you know and feel now!
ah ha! but we can’t do that, but we could indulge ourselves.
So the list of info or advice I would give my younger self!
- Have a better plan for your life. I had a very simple plan, finish engineering, get a job and then earn well. That’s it. For the 18-year-old me, it seemed good to have this clarity at least. But when It was achieved I didn’t know where to go when I had to change companies. I didn’t have clear career path to follow. I went with my gut, that’s it. Even if my plan hadn’t worked, I would have a guideline to work with. But like they say “Life is what happens when you are busy planning it”. It did!
Don’t be scared to test your love. I had this opportunity ( I had the visa) to study masters in Germany, but just before I went, Love happened. He encouraged me to go on and pursue my studies, he believed that we could get through a long distance relationship. But I didn’t, I was scared to loose what I just got, scared about the uncertainties if I went. So, I decided not to go.
Exercise more, don’t be lazy. My weight was a concern, but not an issue. Didn’t feel that pinch, didn’t discipline myself to be healthier, even when I had a sister and friends who did motivate me. Now I am trying to take on my advice. Finally.
Don’t be complacent. There is always room to improve skills and knowledge. I wish had taken this piece of advice given by a friend of mine. I didn’t fully comprehend what he meant. I tended to not think about, or dwell on it. He meant to put in a little extra effort to score better marks, to actually study. I coasted by with last minute studying for the exams. But when I started my career and moved along, I understood what he meant that day. That I tend to take the easy option when I little effort could give much better results. I settle for “it’s good”.
Trust a friend, not their judgement on others. I was very naive and gullible in college. So if someone was my friend, I had complete trust and even trusted their view about someone, their views and opinions became mine. Especially with a couple of people, I had this major presumption about them that hindered our friendship. I have made amends long after, but I don’t think that was enough.
Appreciate her certain choices, creating a wishlist/ bucket list, being self-aware. Appreciation for a lot of things that did work out in my favour, I made a list of things to do for when I earned. I did tick off most of them – travelling, trekking, being out a lot, hanging out with buddies, taking guitar classes, having my own RXZ (sold it later!), engaging in a lot of good conversation with good people, living life on my own terms ..to name a few.
This is my retrograde thinking. What is yours?
Well, if you do have something that you would want to tell your younger self, do leave a comment. I would definitely appreciate the effort and time. Thanks!