If given a chance, what would you tell your 18-20 years old self from where you stand today?

For clarity, this is not a post about living in hindsight, living with regrets. It’s not, for I believe, We as people take decisions or make choices for that given moment, with all our experiences and resources, information, emotional maturity and behaviour of people around us at that time. It is our best-informed decision for “that” moment alone.

So it’s upon us and us alone for all that we are now! Period.

But it’s therapeutic, or has a calming effect, to think that you could have been someone else, a better version of yourself if only you knew back then, what you know and feel now!

ah ha! but we can’t do that, but we could indulge ourselves.

So the list of info or advice I would give my younger self!

  • Have a better plan for your life.                                                                                                                              I had a very simple plan, finish engineering, get a job and then earn well. That’s it. For the 18-year-old me, it seemed good to have this clarity at least. But when It was achieved I didn’t know where to go when I had to change companies. I didn’t have clear career path to follow. I went with my gut, that’s it. Even if my plan hadn’t worked, I would have a guideline to work with. But like they say “Life is what happens when you are busy planning it”. It did!

  • Don’t be scared to test your love.                                                                                                                          I had this opportunity ( I had the visa) to study masters in Germany, but just before I went, Love happened. He encouraged me to go on and pursue my studies, he believed that we could get through a long distance relationship. But I didn’t, I was scared to loose what I just got, scared about the uncertainties if I went. So, I decided not to go.

  • Exercise more, don’t be lazy.                                                                                                                                 My weight was a concern, but not an issue. Didn’t feel that pinch, didn’t discipline myself to be healthier, even when I had a sister and friends who did motivate me. Now I am trying to take on my advice. Finally.

  • Don’t be complacent. There is always room to improve skills and knowledge.                                    I wish had taken this piece of advice given by a friend of mine. I didn’t fully comprehend what he meant. I tended to not think about, or dwell on it. He meant to put in a little extra effort to score better marks, to actually study. I coasted by with last minute studying for the exams. But when I started my career and moved along, I understood what he meant that day. That I tend to take the easy option when I little effort could give much better results. I settle for “it’s good”.

  • Trust a friend, not their judgement on others.                                                                                               I was very naive and gullible in college. So if someone was my friend, I had complete trust and even trusted their view about someone, their views and opinions became mine. Especially with a couple of people, I had this major presumption about them that hindered our friendship. I have made amends long after, but I don’t think that was enough.

  • Appreciate her certain choices, creating a wishlist/ bucket list, being self-aware.                           Appreciation for a lot of things that did work out in my favour, I made a list of things to do for when I earned. I did tick off most of them – travelling, trekking, being out a lot, hanging out with buddies, taking guitar classes, having my own RXZ (sold it later!), engaging in a lot of good conversation with good people, living life on my own terms ..to name a few.

This is my retrograde thinking. What is yours?

Well, if you do have something that you would want to tell your younger self, do leave a comment. I would definitely appreciate the effort and time. Thanks!

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8 thoughts on “Retrograde thinking…

  1. Great Blog Sumathi!!

    To add on a few things I would say are some things from the movie “Love You Zindagi” where Shahrukh asks on “What are the best moments you remember you had in your child hood?” and he does the same when is grown up too i.e. catching the sea waves.

    I believe its all about perception on how everyone sees the things…I do remember a friend of mine whom I met last week, who made a great water fountain using some old wooden piece he found on road side. A photographer will see all objects with his lens eye, and so on.

    Like

  2. Well done Sumati…
    We are what we are because of our past, we should respect that and ofcourse make peace with the present. Between all this we should do what makes us really happy.
    Keep writing! Cheers !

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Life is struggle don’t leave your hope you have done a good job everything happens for the good work hard to reduce your weight you will be appreciated 🌟🌟🌟

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Hi Sumathi, Simply well written and to the point. Brought back many memories of similar situations and I found my story too encapsulated in some parts of it as well. And I’d probably tell the 18-yr old-self a whole lot things that I can’t write here!
    It’s always good to pen down what you feel but the bravest is to share them with others. For that kudos to you.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Good write up. Never have I come across giving advice to myself 12 yrs back.

    1st thought that came to my mind is you shouldn’t have sold your RXZ..

    Another advice I would want to give myself would be start thinking enterprenual..

    Build on meditation..

    Those who look outward arise and those who look inwards awaken.. more importance need to be given inward

    If you do not know to be happy today it’s less likely for you be happy tomorrow. Because happiness is a conscious choice and not by chance

    Like

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