Bitter Truth: Women Don’t Have Each Other’s Back (sometimes!)

Bitter Truth: Women Don’t Have Each Other’s Back (sometimes!)

So going with the theme of International Women’s Day (IWD) I could write about the many fights and struggles that women have all over the world for their rights to equality in all aspects of their lives. There are innumerable articles that have quoted famous women. The Google Doodle pays tribute to female pioneers. It’s a day for positive reflection and celebration of all achievements of women.

But I couldn’t. I had this itch to write about the fact that (sometimes) women necessarily don’t have the support of her peer women or other women within their circle of family/friends/colleagues.

How many of us have complained or at the least have been irritated by one such woman around us?

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In office

Although, most women can be at least congenial to each other, there’ll be one person who isn’t and more so, are competitive with you. Why do women who have similar roles and responsibilities aren’t supporting each other but working to usurp the other. When there are more men in the workplace and the women need to keep themselves as allies, they end up being hostile. Is it that woman who seems to be fighting for her rights for pay, recognition and appreciation forget that her fellow woman too is in the same boat as her?

Why is it that sometimes it could be worse to have a female manager, who’d expect a much higher level of work from female subordinates? How many women in the HR are proactively trying to fit the women in a better position on the bell curve? Asking themselves the question whether they have given a fair chance to their women colleagues?

At Home

The age old problem/issues of women, the mother-in-law [MIL] syndrome. The daughter-in-law [DIL] isn’t given the support as the daughter. Even when the MIL is someone who has had an education, had been a working woman, she doesn’t give the same level of understanding to her DIL, why? Is this power struggle or just plain old spite?

Sometimes the very same person, who’d champion for you, is also a naysayer in some situations. I am talking about the mothers. Many a time, the daughters are not only fighting for the approval of the men in her family, she is also fighting for the women’s.

Side note: To the mothers with a son or two. We need to teach them to respect women, not just by saying so, but by being an example. When you stand up to the wrongs in your life. They learn. Boys aren’t always gonna be boys, they become men. Remember we are raising our son’s to go out into the world to be with women who are somebody’s daughters.

The General Society

There is no one more judgmental of women and her choices than other women. They love to *itch about others. No matter how forward women go, there’ll always be few,  who’d take it upon themselves to trash someone’s reputation.

When in public, if a woman has been teased and she looks for a little support to stand up to that teaser, she doesn’t have more women coming to her aide.

Women body shame other women, easily. Even if not in front of them they’ll do it behind their back.

Why do some women don’t compliment other women? Simple things like a good dress, a new hairdo. Many do, but a few don’t.

Enough with my rant. I would like to make an observation using this platform to say my piece on the Equality for Women.

There are situation where because we are women,

  • We have gone by without paying penalty for something.
  • We have been has recognised or appreciated amongst men for the same level of work.
  • We have asked to be treated special (Do men need to be that chivalrous?)
  • We have used the women card, when clearly there was no need to.

We shouldn’t feel entitled to appreciation or recognition without working to deserve it.

Also, in the garb of feminism, we shouldn’t dress trashy, be rude to others, and get into men bashing (the undeserving ones)

Finally, let us show more solidarity to one another. Coz if not for us, who else will.

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